The last month has been filled with ups and downs, as usual. I've been on the verge of a 50 pound loss for the last couple of weeks without much movement. I find this has been a process of continual rededication to the plan. It's not easy. I've been doing well for the most part, I think.
I opened the door the other day to find my new neighbor introducing herself...with a plate of cookies. I definitely had mixed feelings about it. Both joy and terror (about the cookies, that is). They looked and smelled delicious...pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. I had started the day with a feeling of rededication. It had been my birthday the day before and after having a good day, I found myself the recipient of birthday cookies. I felt sabotaged and trapped and I couldn't just leave them be. I was hoping after some time and practice, I would be able to handle such dilemmas on my own. But this was not the case. I promptly ate all 5 cookies within a moment and feeling discouraged, I went out for ice cream...a half gallon of it. I'm sure you can imagine what happened next. So with that being my day before, I was once again faced with cookies. I wanted to do things different this time. I tried to think. Do I eat just one and crumple the rest in the toilet? Do I not eat any because I know I can't stop? Do I have the strength to do either one? I did decide to wait for after dinner and then I ate a couple. But it wasn't long before the rest called my name.
It's difficult to say when or if I'll be able to be in a room alone with treats and not overdo it. But I keep trying. I've been told it's too soon to expect. Maybe with more time. But I have lost almost 50 pounds in the last 6 months. I must be doing something right!